It’s always hard to come back from adventure to normal life.
When I travel, when I bike, when I run, I feel so alive to everything. Part of that is seeing new things and pushing old, tired boundaries. But part of it is simply the act of being in the world, being outside, feeling part of something amazing and large and beautiful. Traveling or being in new places always reminds me how much I love life, how lucky I am to be part of this world.
Of course, I do often feel that way at home: an excellent run through Forest Park, say, or a bike ride snatched from the clutches of daily routine, or hanging out with a dear friend do wonders for being excited about life.
Often I come home from adventure to these kinds of things–to my Portland community–and am so very excited to be back.
Right now, though, I’m having a hard time. Perhaps that’s in part because this is my grumpy time at work, the time where there’s just enough work just poorly enough paid to make me wonder why I bother. (Of course, come summer, I’ll hardly be able to believe that I have such an awesome job:) The darkness in the mornings and evenings, too, is getting better every day now but makes me a little sad when it’s still dark at 7 and already feeling like evening at 2. (Good thing I don’t live in Alaska right now!)
Perhaps there are many things conspiring to stick me in my grass-is-greener adventure mode, where I wonder why life needs to be settled or what it would be like to be constantly in motion. Of course, I know enough to know that this is mostly a matter of the grass seeming greener–it sounds good in theory, but it turns out that I sure like Portland and my friends too. How long would it take before I missed normal life?
If there’s anything I learned last year, it’s that many small trips help me feel sane in the face of routine (yes, I’m aware that sane for me may at times sound fairly insane for others;) So I’m heading out for a mini trip this weekend, just a small nod to spontaneity to help me get back into things here. Ironic, I suppose, that to feel better about Portland I’m going to leave it for a few days, but I think it’ll help.
Into the shitty weather I go! :)